Thursday, August 20, 2009

***SECRET MEMO***DO NOT READ***


(gentlemen set your phasers to snark)
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>>>THANK YOU FOR ENTERING SECRET PASSCODE <<<

9th through 17th degree masons (cause thats the rank of the real secret leaders, heh heh, sorry 33rd's.....stroke white cat here). As we all know, because we actually wrote it, there will be a new book released in the month of Septembiconus that will heighten the interest in our brotherhood.
Unbeknownst to all, but knowenst to us, we have already laid the ground work to secretly keep our secret intentions and meetings secret and I would like to reiterate the plan for those who have just earned the rank of 000000000013579 in seret.
Firstly,
If your lodge has done actually nothing to create or maintain a "website"....bravo. You are the frontline of keeping those whipper snappers who use the interweb for everything from finding anything out about our wonderful fraternity. Sure there are plenty of "sites" out there but if there were young men who wanted to join you in your particular area they can find out nothing about you unless they accidently stumble upon a meeting, somehow.
Secondly,
For those who have a had "website" forced upon you by an overbearing Grand Lodge who actually maintains and pays for it. Don't do anything with it. I repeat DON"T DO ANYTHING WITH IT. Make sure that the pages are the same standard ones that were forced upon you and if you can, make sure that if you do anything write a message from the East from 2003 that states how excited you are about the upcoming picnic or whatever mundane thing you can think of. We really want those techy types to think that we are the most out of date boring organization out there. THAT'LL keep em out!
Everything will go according to plan if we maintain that our fraternity is your grandfathers or great granfathers thing and not anything that would appeal to a "modern" man...
Our numbers will fall back to their proper pre-enlightenment size and we can go back to the ice cream socials and sock hops that we all fondly remember.
From the North Eastern Corner,
Matt M. Morris
(because you already knew my name)
>>>END OF TRANSMISSION<<<



the book is coming???!!!???


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